At 5, I was a horse crazy kid. I rode my pony, Sandy, everywhere. I didn't own a saddle, so I rode bareback , staying on with the same comfort level as a monkey sitting on a branch, without fear of falling off my precious little haflinger. We wandered aimlessly, saving the world from demons and dragons. Stopping now and then, I lay dreaming, while he protected me from all the demons as he grazed. He was my best friend in the world. One day my father came up behind us without speaking and spooked Sandy by smacking him on his rear end. Sandy reared up in terror and as I was getting up from falling off his back I looked up. The last thing I remembered was seeing his back hoof coming directly at my face. I awoke in the hospital with a bad headache and a skull fracture. By the time I got out of the hospital, my parents had sold the “dangerous animal” that would surely kill me. I never saw my little blonde friend again.
Years passed and when the opportunity arose for me to ride again as an adult, so did a great deal of fear. My fear of horses had developed to the degree that most psychiatrists would consider it a phobia. I was petrified, scared for my life, by even seeing the sight of a horse! My mouth became bone dry, my heart pounding and I would break into a sweat the closer I came to a horse. Despite my phobia I had always been amazed and intrigued by the big beasts with their incredible beauty and grace. How did my love turn into this?
I did get back on a horse and rode years later, with a stubborn desire to heal from this phobia. Now I ride every chance I get. I’m too old now to play games of fighting demons and dragons on my horse but my intense love of them has returned to replace the fear. I managed to work through the terror that had grown in my head. I'd like to share some of what I found worked in learning to cope and eventually to ride again.
This was a slow process for me. I began by getting close enough to just see the horses but didn't touch them. Then as my comfort level increased I reached up to pet a horse named Romeo, a stallion. As stallions are known for their fiesty, agressive natures may seem quite surprising that this was the first horse I made contact with. I pet him more, fed him carrots and grass that I picked for him. Eventually, I moved on to grooming him. I cleaned the stables with the other horses near me as they were coming in and out with their riders and eventually developed the courage to attempt to ride again myself. These are what helped me increase my comfort level:
Slow and steady
1. Take lessons from a qualified instructor. Honestly explain your fears and concerns. If the instructor pushes you to go too far beyond your comfort level, find another riding school or at the very least make it very clear to your instructor that you are not ready to do what they are asking.
2. Take it slow.
3. Make sure that you are riding what experienced horse people refer to as a "confidence builder". This is a horse that doesn't bolt, fidget much, or prance around and is very, very quiet and possibly even too lazy to move fast.
4. Don't worry about appearing foolish. Focus on your own goals and be proud of your accomplishments.
5. Work on doing things the right and safe way. Feeling secure in the saddle will be the quickest and best way to overcome your fear. Make this clear to your instructor. Ask him or her about the three points of contact that makes your seat most secure. These are the pubic bone and your two seat bones and if these three are in contact with the saddle it gives you better balance and security. Get them to show you the most balanced way to hold your body in the saddle and the correct form.
6. Relax. If you tense up your body will be tense and you will lose your 3 points of contact. Try some breathing exercises where you breathe deeply through your diaphram.
7. For the first few lessons with the horse at a walk focus on your position NEVER let anyone bully you into anything you aren't ready for. When you are comfortable and not as nervous you can then take a leap of faith and trot a few steps. Go slow though - you'll get there.
8. When you're riding concentrate on the technical aspects of riding. eg. Are my feet in the stirrups in line with my ears? Is my posture correct? Are my reins held correctly in my hands? Are my arms holding the reins at the correct angle? Am I leaning too far forward or too far back? If you remember to breath and think of other things besides your fear it will go a long way to conquering that fear.
9. A good way to gain confidence is to have a friend use a lunge line with the horse going in circles so that you only have to focus on a few things at once.
10. Try closing your eyes for short periods while you ride and just feel the rythm of the horse and work on balancing from just the feel of its movements. This also develops more of a connection and trust between you and your horse.
11. Try some exercises to improve your balance such as holding your arms straight out to the side and bringing them back to touch your shoulders. Without raising yourself from the saddle reach back and try and touch the horses tail and then reach forward towards his ears. This alsoincreases your flexibility.
12. Spend time grooming your horse. Talk to it when you're riding or grooming because if you're talking to it you're focusing on what you're saying rather than on the fear you're feeling. Constantly talk to your horse whether you're on his back or working with him on the ground.
13. Become comfortable with your horse on the ground, leading it, grooming it and putting its tack on. These all help increase your confidence.
14. Research horse riding and handling. Books and videos are available at your local library about riding, grooming and handling horses as well as caring for them, first aid and training as well. Knowledge is another key element to reducing fear.
15. Most of all breathe and be patient with both yourself and the horse.
16. Take the time to study and watch riders that you admire for their skill and note how they hold their bodies and other elements that you think might improve your own skills.
17. Some good links on Youtube to watch for improving your riding seat are:
18. Some good links on Youtube for improving your riding seat are:
Excellent Link for getting a good seat: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uhr7h0TExAI&feature=related
How to improve you classical seat: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8Sl6SeJEzOo
Good Thigh contact:: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o8qMg4Lh24Y&feature=related
Piano Hands: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F4euwFV75f0&feature=related
Ankle Position: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nMUzBO03Emc&feature=related
Stop Pulling on your horses mouth: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8J4yjVQDvac&feature=related
Good Luck and have fun. I hope you grow to enjoy being with horses as much as I do!
Romeo the horse that helped me start my journey back from my phobia
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